The Wingman’s Guide to Parade Day Creepin’ Teaser

 

   How do you feel about sexy girls who aren’t thinking of the morality of their decisions? Personally, I’m a fan.

I wouldn’t exactly call them girlfriend material, but for meaningless random hookups what could be better? That’s why even more than Halloween; Scranton’s Saint Patrick’s Parade Day has always been my favorite holiday of creepin’.

It’s a marathon day full of drunken girls that just don’t care. It’s the perfect birthday celebration for me as my 27th is March 10th, but the true celebration will be Saturday.

My entourage and I have always enjoyed a wicked game I created. Get yourself a stack of index cards, and give one to each friend.

Every girl you makeout with, you rate on a scale of negative-two to 10. For other acts – e.g., booby touching, breast sucking, finger banging, muff diving, hand jobs, blowjobs, traditional sex, anal sex, other sick shit you and your friends are into – figure out a system of additional points for each endeavor. When Parade Day culminates – it begins when you start partying in the morning and ends when you finally go home – the one with the high score wins.

If you actually have a group of “real friends” you should be able to utilize the honor system. However, if your friends are fake untrustworthy cocksuckers then require a witness. My boys and I are old school so we trust each other.

 

Look for “The Wingman Chronicles” hitting book stores in next year to read the rest of the story!

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